Monday, July 25, 2005

Boxes and cages. Cages and boxes.

Why do we need to define all relationships? To box them up. To place them in squares, triangles, circles. To cage them. To give them parameters and boundaries and limits. And then to want to think out of the box, to want to flee the very cage we set up, to want to escape the boundaries we create.
It’s easy to say go with the flow. A flow can be dangerous, damming it even more dangerous. Dams burst…
But vague, undefined, loose relationships… How many of us can deal with those in our lives? Should we? Should we learn to unlearn maps and routes and let relationships meander and walk and run and jog the way they want to? To not put landmarks and milestones and ‘show’ them the way? To not expect them to steer the ‘right’ course, but instead let them go as the wind takes them? And as a result bear the consequences of landing up lost? In a mirage, in a sand dune, in the ocean or simply at sea?
And then to stand back and think ‘let me retrace my steps and go back, back to where I came from, to the boxes and the cages’, or to think ‘let me go further where this takes me. If I’m in the sea, let me go scuba diving, if I’m in the dunes, let me get my feet wet with sand, and if I’m in a mirage, let me wait till it clears’.
Let me create a new map.
Or let me live my life based on maps already designed, already printed. Boxes and cages. Cages and boxes.


Blogger writer-in-egg-style said...

Couple of points.

1. Salute the coherence of the philosophers who say that to cede your "free will" to any defined or undefined entity is to shirk responsibility in the silliest imaginable way. Among other things, it means you are foisting a job description ("hey, run my life, willya") on a force beyond your ken.

No, you have free will.

2. Favour out-of-the-box thoughts if you find that the "box" (an evident product of collective and individual thoughts from the past), has assumed a far greater authority over humankind than is justified -- to quote Einstein.

No, you have a free mind.

25 July, 2005  
Blogger Again - author said...

First things first: Lol@ egg-style. WhatEVERRRRR... If I need to understand what you write, i need to have open simultaneously. Thankfully, there is no such urge.

Exile: It's a little scary to define ALL relationships. It doesn't happen... never. If we even try to, we end up complicating things.
Likewise, ALL relationships don't have a beginning or an end. At times, we wish they did. But they don't. It's just for us to know how important they were/are. They need not neccesarily go anywhere...
And TRYING to make them go somewhere will ALWAYS bring along a storm - a storm that we'd rather not have in our lives.

25 July, 2005  
Blogger Yours Truly...Conman said...

The Boxes and Cages, no matter how frustrating at times, keep us protected from those storms, I think.

25 July, 2005  
Blogger the cowlick said...

One has to be mature enough to be able to handle all relationships that have no boundaries.

25 July, 2005  
Anonymous ppm said...

what is it that we are really afraid of in an undefined relationship.. of losing soemthign that is precious to us? of gettign hurt? or beign made a fool of?
we all live in boxes and cages the only difference is some live in boxes and cages of the society's making and some live in boxes of their own making.

methinks, if we do not let go of our fears we will never succeed in making our own boxes, we will live forever, in boxes defined by others, if I get to define my own box, what is a bloody nose and a broken heart( or two :) ) ? it will hurt like hell then, but what won't kill me will teach me soemthign new ( hopefully!)
anyhow, just a humble thought.

27 July, 2005  
Blogger the cowlick said...

ppm.. I guess we all have made our own boxes and hurt our noses and hearts to be able to now tell others how much it hurts when that happens.

27 July, 2005  
Blogger GSB said...

hmmm... interesting comments...
Conman: you are right, it is to protect us from the storms.
Cowlick: yes we need that maturity, do we all have it?
ppm: yes we are afraid of getting hurt, of losing people we love, of hurting people we love... and whether the boxes and cages are constructed by society or by us, does it matter? they are still boxes and cages... right?

28 July, 2005  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good stuff. Here's my take on this subject. The boxes and cages are an age old thing. They have been passed on to us by society. We don't create them. Our thinking is bound by the misconception of certain relationships fulfilling all our needs. The truth is that no one relationship can ever do that.

29 July, 2005  
Anonymous rusty-springfield said...

Anon, you give yourself away, methinks

or no?

02 August, 2005  

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